kyiv-in-2024

Kyiv, My Forever Home: Amid the Shadows of War

How the 2022 War Changed Kyiv Forever – Walking Through Key Locations

My son and I left Kyiv two weeks after the full-scale invasion began, on March 9, 2022. Since that day, I haven’t been back to Ukraine for two years. My entire family of origin remains there, spread across two different cities and regions. For all these two years, we’ve only seen each other through video calls. I missed them terribly, as well as my beloved Kyiv.

In March 2024, I finally bought train tickets from Warsaw to Kyiv, followed by plane tickets from Gothenburg to Warsaw. Both the flights and the train trip to Kyiv went smoothly. As the train approached the city, I saw the familiar landscapes of the Ukrainian capital’s suburbs. My chest tightened and tears streamed down my cheeks. I hadn’t been in my beloved city for two years – I missed it so much.

The two weeks flew by, and on the last day, I cried a lot. I didn’t want to leave; I was just getting used to being there again. Even the two sleepless nights during some of the most massive rocket attacks on the city seemed to fade from memory within a couple of days. I felt the warmth of my homeland.

Those two weeks in Kyiv… I walked a lot, explored, and ruminated over my past life in this city. Every day, I made it a point to go outside. Despite the air raid alerts and missile strikes, I couldn’t help but soak in every bit of Kyiv, breathe it in, and savor it.

So much has changed in Kyiv since the pre-war days. There’s an almost tangible tension in the air, never letting you relax, even for a moment. Air raid sirens, claps, and explosions from air defense systems stay at the back of your mind, a constant reminder that your day could be disrupted at any moment.

A planned meeting might not happen, a theater visit could be canceled, or a pleasant meal at a café interrupted, leaving your plate unfinished. In the event of an air raid alert, people must immediately take shelter and wait until it is lifted. The uneasy feeling, the constant “what if” is running through your mind all the time.

St. Michael’s Golden-Domed Monastery: Faith and Resilience

From Maidan, it’s just a short walk uphill to the shining blue walls and golden domes of St. Michael’s Monastery. In peacetime, this was a favorite stop for visitors. Its bells ringing across the city, groups of tourists posing for photos, and pilgrims lighting candles inside the cathedral.

Passing by St. Michael’s Golden-Domed Cathedral nowadays, one often witnesses a procession bidding farewell to a fallen war hero. Outside the walls stretches the Wall of Remembrance — rows of portraits of Ukrainian soldiers who died defending the country since 2014. Each day, new photos are added.

There are countless fresh flowers, candle lanterns, and silent, sorrowful people walking slowly, looking at the brave faces of those who have already given their lives. Strong emotions welled up in my heart, it’s not easy to be in this place of memory for me.

War trophies – russian military equipment, rusted in some parts and riddled with bullet holes in others -sit grotesquely on display in the square near the golden-domed cathedral.

Crowds gather there too, some observing the heaps of metal with curiosity, others with disdain. Nearby, a street musician dressed in a military uniform sings and plays somber songs about the war, fallen comrades, and Ukraine.

It pains me to see these ghosts of war in this beautiful city – my beloved Kyiv, the city that became my home 20 years ago. The city, I grew to love so deeply that I wanted to show it to the world, to tell its story to people from every corner of the globe.

Will I ever be a guide in Kyiv again? Will I again show its beauty to my dear guests? I still have warm memories of those happy days. I truly wish for this. But I’m not thinking about that now.

All I want is for the war to end, and for russian missiles to stop bombing my country.

How glad I am that I decided to come, even if only for two weeks, even in March (not the best season for this beautiful city).

But now, looking at these photos, I smile. I feel so warm inside, though a little sad too.

Until next time, hopefully soon, my beloved city Kyiv ❤️!

About the author:

Victoria Deshko Avatar

Hello and welcome! My name is Victoria, and I’m a private tour guide in Kyiv. Since 2016, I have been offering private tours on various topics for visitors to the capital of Ukraine. I speak fluent English and love sharing stories. When not guiding, I write about Ukraine on my blog and my travel experiences and insights in Sweden and the Baltics.

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